Auteur/autrice : marc

Day 537. Why are we angry? We can be angry at somebody or at something. Anger is an emotion. It can spearhead action and call for a change. This is what psychologists consider the good side of anger. However, it’s easy to cross the line that delineates the good warning system from the harmful reaction to our health and relationships.

Although, as for all emotions, we cannot control anger, we can however control our response to anger. Anger expressed with violence is destructive, anger expressed with assertiveness is helpful. Anger is actually the result of our ineffectualness, of our inability to handle a situation that we feel goes beyond our control.

We are angry at a kid breaking a glass while trying to drink. We are angry at a situation that goes haywire in a direction that we did not forecast. We are angry at an action somebody takes while we expected something else. In all those situation, it’s normal to get angry, it’s not constructive to react violently and vehemently. It may feel good, but it will always destroy trust, confidence and relationship. It’s much better to breathe and confront the reality by evaluating the situation and its outcome. One of the methods I found useful in most cases is to ask two questions to yourself or to the other party involved: Is this really important? What should have been different?

Generally, even if it’s an important event, there’s always a lot to learn from it. And as I was saying recently, either you win our your learn! When angers comes in, better learn!

Day 536. Shun Fujimoto. For most people, this name is unknown. In 1976 were held the Montreal Olympics. During those, the little prodigy Nadia Comăneci, got the first ever perfect 10 at the uneven bars (that was displayed 1.00 because the scoreboard had only 3 digits, as nobody ever expected a 10.00), but one of the other striking events was the gold medal of the Japanese gymnastic team, winning ahead of the dominant Russian team.

Victory was given to the Japanese by one man: Shun Fujimoto, getting a good 9.5 on the pommel horse and 9.7 on the rings. However, Shun participated in both events, with a broken knee cap! He broke is knee during the floor exercise, but did not want to let his team down. He therefore participated in the pommel horse and rings, which did not require standing station, but at the end of the exercise. If you ever broke a bone in your body, you know how this hurts (although endorphins generated by the physical exercise will sooth the pain temporarily). Shun participated, going over this pain, and the Japanese team won the everlasting Olympics gold medal.

Temporary pain was less important than the everlasting pride to have won an Olympics gold medal. Every time I face a hurdle in my life, I keep coming back to this athlete in Montreal (an easy memory for me as I was in Montreal at that time and had the chance to witness the French gold medal of Guy Drut on the 110m hurdles, but that’s another story). I do not know if I would have been capable to do what Shun did. It’s an example of what the brain can help you achieve when you value long term over short term. Are you ready?

Day 535. TGIF! Everybody knows what it means. It means that for a majority of people, this is the last working day of the week before a two-day week-end. Of course, this alludes to the fact that working is a chore and yes, the last day of a chore feels good. But it has another subtle meaning: the last four days were days of suffering and yes, this is about to be over!

Now, the question you have to ask yourself is: are you ready to spend five seventh of your life (around 70%) of your life suffering? I am not! Once image I always refer to is the coin. A coin has two faces, although it’s the same coin. A job has two faces to, and it’s your decision to look at the one you want. Either you chose to make it valuable and pleasurable, or invaluable and disagreeable. With the later, TGIF (but man, WTF). In the former, what? TGI already/only F! I had a great week and I look forward to Monday.

This is not about enjoying what you dislike, it’s about making your life a pleasurable experience. We have only one life I believe, and this should be a life of everyday happiness. Easier said than done? It’s a choice, like every action you take or do not take. Ready to toss the coin?